What B-Schools DO teach you...

Statistically speaking, B-School entrance examinations in India attract more people than the Vatican. So it is reasonable to say that a B-School can be looked upon as a Temple of Learning. But what exactly does a B-School teach you? Here are a few points:

1. Leadership.. is the art of getting the job done by someone else. Technical term? Outsourcing.
2. Knowledge.. is the amount of jargon-filled BS you can talk in the time given to you. The idea is to confuse the other person so much that he'll never know that YOU DO NOT KNOW ANYTHING!!!
3. Work Ethic.. make sure the person from whom you're copying your assigments has this. All you need to do is show up in the end and make sure the spelling of your name on the cover page is correct.
4. Punctuality.. is essential, if you don't matter that is. If you are famous (and by this I mean head of some stupid committee), you can show up whenever you want.
5. Dress Code.. wearing an Armani is not going to get you to grow a brain. Believe me, it's a lot more relaxing in your khakis.
6. Friendship.. forget it. Nothing like this exists. People are just queing up to screw you behind your back.
7. Networking.. is simply kissing ass so someone will hire an undeserving imbecile like you and pay that fat salary.

So, there you have it. 6 key pillars on which these Cradles of Leadership stand. Now ain't you glad that you didn't get through CAT???